It's been over a week since my oldest daughter told me she was angry with me for spending too much time at the computer. I wasn't surprised. I knew I was spending too much time online. And I knew she was angry about it, feeling neglected. I had just never heard her say it.
I was embarrassed that she said it in front of my husband, though. I was exposed. Although I'm sure he wasn't too surprised by her statement either.
I intended to make changes right away, but 9 days have gone by and I have to admit I haven't made a noticeable change yet. And I need to if I want to keep my oldest daughter's heart ... and the hearts of her younger siblings.
I know my friend UnschoolingMama would understand. I know she'd be nodding her head and telling me to just get on with what I should be doing if she read this. She's been urging me and other women not to let the computer take us away from our families for several years. She even blogged about it just last week.
I do well for awhile and then I find myself getting sucked in more and more. Falling into very bad habits. It's much worse now that we have DSL that doesn't tie up the phone line when I'm online. I can't shut the computer off each day since my husband programs on it at night for extra income and usually leaves his work open. I just have to exercise some willpower and actually live out the priorities I profess.
I have to, because I'm over halfway done raising my oldest daughter. In 8 years she'll have completed high school and could be marrying soon after that. I have so much to teach her between now and then, and I'm not being a good example.