The never-ending battle!

This blog post has been entered in The Christian Home magazine's weekly issue.  You can read more entries at The Legacy of Home blog.

 

I hate to confess this, but I'm trying to slowly regain a sense of order, good habits, and cleanliness in our home.  It's a slow battle as there are so many things we have neglected since Baby V was born 9 months ago.  I foolishly thought my summer would be relaxed and I could focus on catching up in these areas.  Ha ha!  We are making slow, but steady progress, and learning a few more rules along the way.

 

Housekeeping Rule #745

If you're wondering how clean your floors are, borrow a crawling baby for the day.  Nothing will test the cleanliness of your floors more than a baby wearing pastel sleepers and onesies scooting and crawling around.

 

We didn't really think  about how long it had been since we mopped the wood floors, until she started crawling.    We had to replace our mop, but we've mopped now!  And I don't plan to let it get that bad again.  (I promise it had not been 9 months since we mopped the living room floor, just a few months.)

 

Housekeeping Rule #15

If you can't find a solution, ask your teen.  They always have an answer.

 

One of my daughters was advising me that the solution to our struggle was for me to create detailed chore charts.  I replied to her that I can attest from experience that the best charts in the world can not work without diligence and compliance from the children (and adults!) in the family.  If we decide we don't feel like doing much today, then we will pay for it tomorrow.  She felt like I was being negative to not consider her suggestion.  I think she's forgotten the many variations of chore charts we decorated our fridge with in the past.

 

Housekeeping Rule #381

If you really want help folding laundry, hold it hostage.  The camp-bound children WILL help fold clothes in order to be able to pack faster.

 

Housekeeping Rule #1005

He who puts away the most clothes, has control.  He who puts away the least, can walk further.

 

This weekend I was folding clothes while the children were cleaning the living room and vacuuming it.   I couldn't fold at the couch, or the dining room table (because it hadn't been cleaned yet), so I was folding them on my bed with one of my campers helping.  As I folded it dawned on me that 5/10 of the people whose clothes I was folding belong in my room or the one next to it, and I put that half of the clothes away myself.  Not to mention linens, kitchen towels, and bathroom towels are all close to my room.  I guess I should fold on my bed more often.  It saves trips for me, and it means that the clothes won't sit in stacks for several days waiting for children to put their clothes away.  They will have to be OFF my bed by bedtime.  That may be our new plan ... and since I washed 4 loads today, I can test it tomorrow when I fold.

 

I don't know how long it will take to fix up the house and build good habits in the kids and I.  Diligence and patience over time would be my guess.  Ouch!  Now to just figure out where we can buy both of those.

 

Rejoicing in Family,
April E.

A change of perspective and attitude

Sometimes the very things we love can also be the most annoying.  I can easily let myself be irritated when I'm stuck in my recliner with 3 kids in my lap while my "to do list" grows, or I can choose to enjoy the moment.  I reminded myself of that yesterday morning, and then I started thinking of other sweet blessings that won't be here forever.

• a little 2 yo hand slipped into mine as we walk to the car


• a lap so full I can't move underneath 2-3 kids


• slobbery kisses on my cheek from my 9 month old


• razzberries on my arm or belly from my 9 month old (watch out!)


• my teen daughter quietly slipping her hand into mine at Wal-Mart


• a preschooler who wants me to read to her


• a teen who wants to talk about the future with me


• the fact that any of my kids want to talk to me (at all)


• loud laughter and raucous play


• kids singing together (not always well)


• "Mom, can we watch a family movie tonight?"


• children begging to run boring errands with me


• teens who seek my opinion and advice


• children begging for "just a taste" of my food or drink

"Lord, sometimes I get irritated by the fact that I am needed and loved ... too much at times.  Please help me to remember to enjoy each time I am needed and each time the kids want to love on me.  Help me to remember to set aside my "to do list" and just "be" with them.  Help me to put people first.  But, also ... please help me get my work done.  Amen."

 

April E.

I'm supposed to be funny, right?

This blog post has been entered in The Christian Home magazine's weekly issue, for the Gentle Humor column.  You can read more entries at The Legacy of Home blog.

 

I had a really rough week.  I couldn't get on top of my chores all week long.  Every time I decided it was time to go feed the chickens, or work on my laundry, we'd have a diaper blow-out or a fussy little one that needed my attention instead.  I have a pile of books to read for reviews that I wasn't getting read, and review deadlines fast approaching.  I was frustrated and feeling like a failure!

 

Friday was the day I finally reached my boiling point.  I was sad.  I was angry with myself and Steve.  I was trying to figure out how in the world I could honor him for Father's Day when I was so mad at him.  Of course, he had no idea I was mad at him.  Funny how that works.  I knew that I was more angry at myself than anyone else, but it didn't help at that moment.

 

So, I made a long list of all the stuff I was expected to do, all my family obligations, and those outside the home.  Then I stared at it, feeling overwhelmed and frustrated and wondering what I could cut.  That's when I got really depressed.  It didn't seem possible to do it all.  Not unless I cut out some other things I enjoy (like blogging).  Pity Party Time!  Bring on the sighs, the tears, the moping around, the sad voice.  Let the whole world know that Mom is having a very BIG pity party!!

 

It was probably around this time that my teen daughter decided Mom needed some chocolate.  She went to the pantry in the basement and retrieved one for me.  She went to put it in my dresser, where she knows Mom hides her chocolate. Except, she discovered I was already working on a dark chocolate Dove bar.  Sigh.  She put the chocolate bar back and only told me about it later, when I seemed in a better mood.

Because this was such a negative week, I didn't really remember funny things that happened in our home.  Seriously, I was thinking I was just going to have to write a story that made fun of my own emotional pity party on Friday and my daughter trying to bring me chocolate.

 

But then I thought about the message that was sending to my kids about me.  "Chocolate fixes things."   "Mom needs chocolate to be happy." Sigh. That's not the message I want my girls to see in my life.  I want them to know that GOD makes me happy and that PRAYER fixes things ... even if it's just my attitude.  Suddenly there isn't anything funny about the situation at all.  But I'm supposed to be the funny one.

 

We had moments of laughter this week, of course.  You can't live with 8 kids and not laugh.

• We laughed at my 2 year old son's funny way of making sure we don't forget what he wants.  He asks for water and ice in his cup, but if we tell him we'll get water he adds, "and ice".  So we say, "Yes, we'll put ice in it."  Then he adds "and water!"  The same thing happens when he asks for hot dogs and ketchup or a bologna and cheese sandwich.


• We laughed when my 5 yo daughter asked us, "Why are you taking away our activity?" as we removed sleeping bags and tent covers from the clothesline where she was hiding under them.


• We laughed as we tried to catch goats that were much faster, smarter, and stronger than we expected.  Okay, we didn't laugh the WHOLE time we were doing it ... there were also moments of frustration.


• We laughed at how fast our puppy could run, and how loud she could yelp (as if she were dying) when being chased by the neighbor's LARGE dog.  (We made sure to corral the dogs and ensure she wasn't hurt before we laughed.)


• Steve and half the kids laughed as they watched a comedy movie in a tent Friday night, to kick off their camp-out.    The 3 oldest girls and I laughed while watching a comedy movie indoors with Baby V while I folded laundry that night.


• Steve and I laughed as we talked about our own relationship, and some of the kids' little personality quirks at different times this week.


• We all laughed as we enjoyed an illusionist's show at a Christian event Saturday night.


• Steve and I laughed at how the John Deere riding mower has the power to put kids to sleep on Daddy's lap.  We knew it worked on 1 and 2 yo boys, but we didn't realize it worked on 5 yo girls, too.

 

Even in the midst of a really, bad, rotten, no-good, stressed-out week ... there were still moments of joy and peace.   I know there are moments of joy and laughter as I joked with my kids that I don't even remember now.   So, while I still find it easier to focus on the bad parts of this week, I needed the reminder that there was also GOOD in this week.

 

 

Rejoicing in Family,
April E.

Well, it's the thought that counts, right?

This blog post has been entered in The Christian Home magazine's weekly issue.  You can read more entries at The Legacy of Home blog.

 

 

As Christian parents, we try to teach our children not to be selfish, to think of others first, and to serve those around them.  Mainly we get stuck at the first one ... trying to help them give up their innate selfishness as they interact with their siblings.

 

Well, last night our 7 year old displayed a moment of selflessness when he told his teenage sister his thoughts about the future.  I don't know what spawned this particular comment as they were just getting drinks of water before bed, but he was apparently feeling introspective when he said this:

 

"When I die, I don't want to be buried in the cemetery.  I don't want to take anyone else's place.  Just bury me in the back yard."

 

It's good to see he's thinking of others, I guess.  Now we just need to work on a more immediate application, like giving up his right to choose the next movie, or not fighting over a toy with his brother or sister.  Maybe someday.

 

Rejoicing in my family,
April E.

The joy of family

When I was growing up, family reunions were always the highlight of my summer.  I loved listening to my aunts and uncles chat, tease, joke, and laugh.  I loved hanging out with cousins I only saw once a year, and eating all those great summer picnic type foods.  It was hot, sweaty, loud, and fun!

 

My family has two reunions each summer.  One in July at my parents' home which is more specific to my Dad's siblings, and one in June at my Uncle's house which pulls from farther out on the family tree.  We usually try to make it to ONE reunion each summer, though there are years we don't make it to either one.  And it's one of the highlights of my kids' summer, too.

 

This past weekend, we were at my Uncle's house in Oklahoma.  We're home now, exhausted, sunburned, and bug-bitten.  We've washed off the sweat, the pond scum and the fish guts ... but the memories will last forever.  All the way home, the kids relived moments from the reunion.  We shared moments that not everyone had been part of, and rehashed conversations.  Despite the bickering that ensues when 10 tired people climb into a single vehicle, we were still drawn closer together as a family.

 

Every time we stopped for a bathroom break, my 5 year old would wake up again and start to tell us how much she missed her 4 year old cousin.  Our 10 and 7 yo boys talked about the fish they'd caught and the time they'd spent hanging out with my uncle's step-grandkids.  They decided they were their "sorta-cousins".  It's all family and it's all good.

 

I wish I'd written down all the funny things my kids said or did this weekend.  I laughed so many times and thought "I should blog that", but another family story or water gun fight would chase the thought away.   It was a joy to watch the little kids play with their cousins ... so hard they barely stopped to eat.  It was a blessing to watch my teens fish with their younger siblings, take photos of the entire family, play with little cousins, and just enjoy the family conversations.

 

I love family reunions.  I love my family.  I feel sorry for families that don't have family reunions.  Remind me ... someday ... I need to host family reunions here for my own children and grandchildren.  Maybe by then we'll have more than one bathroom, but even if we don't, both of our annual family reunions have proved it can be done with just one bathroom.  (Though my parents now have two bathrooms and my uncle often has a travel trailer that has a bathroom that a select few know about.)

 

And now ... I guess it's time to unpack and clean this house.  I have stinky wet laundry to wash, because my kids played really hard this weekend.  And the rest of us ... well, we sweated a lot.

 

I hope you get to spend time with your extended family this summer, as well.

 

Sunburned and happy,
April E.

Who's next in line?

This blog post has been entered in The Christian Home magazine's weekly issue.  You can read more entries at The Legacy of Home blog

 

This weekend, we discovered the key to helping our kids ( and the parents) be more content with our single bathroom for ten people.  (Okay, so that only counts for showers, since only 8 of those people use the toilet.)

 

So what secret did we discover?  I'm sure anyone with only one bathroom is longing to hear.

 

Attend a family reunion ... with only one bathroom for as many as 75 people.  Okay, so not everyone was there at once, but it still makes for some complications.  "Who's next in line?" was a common question.

 

We are home now, taking turns in our bathroom to wash off the sweat, the dust, and for some kids ... the fish grime and pond scum.  And you know what?  It really isn't too bad.   In fact, it almost feels ... luxurious!

 

Remind me of that the next time I have two children doing the "potty dance" in the hallway and another one taking their time in the bathroom.

 

It was a wonderful family reunion, but it's good to be home.

Rejoicing in Family,
April E.

2010 - 2011 TOS Homeschool Crew Blue Ribbon Awards

The 2010- 2011 Homeschool Crew members voted on their favorite review products for 28 different categories.  The winners for each of those categories was awarded a Homeschool Crew Blue Ribbon.  Click HERE to go see the winners yourself!  Five of our ElCloud Top Ten made it to the list!

 

April E.